Wednesday, January 27, 2010

Music

Its official. My (pirated) music collections have officially exceeded 20GB in size. My old trusted mp3 player can only store up to 1GB amount of music and deleting songs is becoming a very sad routine. I want a bigger storage mp3 player. I want the iPod Classic. Why is it so freaking expensive???

Friday, January 01, 2010

Demon of a different kind

The new semester starts this coming Monday, and I'm trying to put my mind and focus into the course I registered.

I have been feeling very jitterish and nervous about this latest undertaking. While I am excited and interested in doing research, I suffer from every student's disease : procrastination and inconsistent motivation.

There were times when I was an undergrad where I thought I worked best under pressure. And what better way to add pressure in your life than postponing your work to the very last? Pulling all-nighters, typing and exhausting my brain so that I can come out with an acceptable (at least to me) research. During the time when I had to submit my Final Year Project, I actually did not sleep for more than 36 hours. Crazy I know, but miraculously that project was awarded best FYP. If only the awarding committee knew how much of a lazy bum I was during the earlier part of the semester I think they wouldn't have given me that award.

I know that if I had started doing my writing earlier, I won't need to go through that hellish last week before submission. And this is the most scary part : I know that the same tactic ABSOLUTELY won't work now that I'm a graduate student. It would be like comitting suicide.

I can't ever remember me finishing an assignment not before the day/night it was due. That is how chronic my procrastination problem is. I guess that's how I always work. I need that extra push, that extra adrenaline rush, that fear of impending due date before I can focus and actually finish what I started.

I need to change. I need to find a different sort of rush/motivation for doing work. And I still don't know if I can find it. That is a bit scary.